hmmm.. it's been such a long time since i last came. n indeed, i'm amused by how fast and how much things have changed juz over the past few weeks. wonder if everything will be back to before.

At this particular time, you are feeling that you are or were unjustly and undeservedly treated and/or betrayed in your hopes and dreams. You feel that everything is against you. But look on the bright side for you are, whether you believe it or not, a survivor.

You are not be feeling so good at this time. Everything seems to be getting on top of you. What you need is a rest from all of the the present trials and tribulations in peaceful surroundings and with someone - male or female, it doesn't really matter - who can really understand you and appreciates your needs.

Your confidence has been shattered. There are so many things that you would like to do with your life, so many dreams to be fulfilled - and you know that your hopes and dreams are not just figments of your imagination, they are real and you are looking for reassurance from someone. Basically your fears are such that you may be prevented in attaining your hopes and dreams. Even now you would like to broaden your fields of endeavour but in order to develop your 'inner- self' you need peace and solace. You are distressed by the fear that you may be prevented from attaining your goals. What you really need at this particular moment in time is quiet reassurance from someone close to you to restore your confidence.

You are experiencing considerable stress which is essentially the result of on going rejection and hostility. You are in the unpleasant position where offers of trust, affection and understanding are being withheld and you are being treaded with a degrading lack of consideration. You feel that you are being denied the appreciation that you deserve, which is essential to your well-being and self-esteem, but you have to face up to the situation because as matters stand at this time there is little that you can do about it - you feel that you are getting nowhere and the continuous struggle is a lonely one: all difficulties and no encouragement. Whatever you try to say or do is met with continuous hostility and no matter how much you protest you are consistently misunderstood. You need to escape from the situation but you are so perplexed that you cannot find the strength of mind to make the necessary decision.

In the past your trusting attitude has often been misunderstood and so you have needed to protect yourself against your tendency to be abused and taken advantage of. As a consequence you possibly adopt an aloof and critical attitude and you are only willing to let your guard down once sincerity and trustworthiness can be assured.

yea. that's me, now.

*wipe wipe* could see cobwebs hanging ard in my blog le. oh man... so sry for e looooonnnggggggg update. hees.. ohwells. today's gd friday, n here i am, slacking away at home. after a near 7 wks of itp-ing at dmeri@dso [defence medical n environmental research institute@defence science org], my energy level's been kinda drained out. ohwells.

bday juz past by mi on monday.. growing older day by day. sighs.. but among e diff presents i received frm my relatives, i had a damn special prezzie la! my dearest mummy bee made a ppt of many photos frm our yr 1 n yr 2 poly photos n put them tgt. tearing like crazy when i saw it man.. n it's esp touching when she's currently in aust doing her itp. bee bee i love u! hees.. n gracie.. u muz faster recover frm ur not-so-good throat la. tis 2 mths we onli saw each other like, once lo. but den cuz i busy also.. so no choice. sad... wanna see u soon man! thnk god for out daily dose of smsing... =)))

loving it. ah..

=)))

oh dots.......... it's been sooooo long time since i last blog le. hmmm.. hees. sry everyone.. will try to update my blog abit more often frm now on. =) guess e itp stuffs are more or les done.. n seems like almost everyone is going for oitp. sad. =( cant see u all for at least 2mths le. sighs....


-certain memories are etched forever in e heart...-

went to balcony for a drinking session wif grace, chin, dee n benji. it was real fun... seriously had a nice time wif them. talked n laughed over matters deep down in our hearts. love u guys alot. u guys simply rock my life!

saw someone today, n it kinda brought back many memories of another guy. feel damnit cheated. nt tt i like him in tt sense though. but, if u're attached, den sae so honestly! arghs. forget it. shall nt elaborate much. sick n tired of everything. of life. fcuk. n to u-know-who, dont think so much ya.. let things cool down. he's nt worth ur feelings.. let him go slowly. jia you girl.. =)

-hope i can find back e love i once had-

-i never had a dream come true... till e day that i found u. even though i pretend that i've moved on, u'll always be my baby... i never found e words to say.. dont wanna think abt each day. n no matter where will life leads mi to, a part of mi will always b wif u.... u're someone i wont forget.-

nothing's left anymore....

-feeling lost... it sucks when everything's creeping back. once again find myself in a maze. dont know where to go.. how to go. i've failed terribly... n im horribly disappointed in myself. but i juz cant control it.. sry. so much emotions within my heart.. but yet i cant express it out. all tis is making mi so guarded. i wanna release my emotions, but i dont have e ability anymore. tired. real tired. scared.

hiding... -

oh ya.. n to u.. dun worry k? ttz alrd a closed chapter le. =)

oh crapz. tmr getting back results le. sighs... hope dont forward module can le. *praying hard... very hard* hais... no confi tis time round at all when i know i gave up on everything during tt period... ***gave up everything for u.. but in e end, im still e one getting hurt...***

oh well. have been addicted to yan di xing kong + ni na mei ai ta by li sheng jie. dots man.. listen to it onli n i'll b crying like crazy. god... stupid emo roller coaster. juz stop tis once n for all ba. tired le... real tired... like wad i told grace, sometimes we appear, or have stopped loving a person, nt cuz we're unfaithful, but cuz we keep getting hurt till it gets real tired to hold on. yeah... eeeks. e songs made mi emo. stab myself.

anyway, work's starting soon. kinda looking forward to it. =)


-happy, sad, tireds... all mixed in one.-